Miles Millar

Miles Millar

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The Mummy: Tomb Of The Dragon Emperor Review


Bad
In the classic movie monster hierarchy, the cloth-clad Mummy really scrapes the bottom of the scare barrel. Aside from his close kinship with the zombie -- sadly, this is one Egyptian artifact that avoids the mandatory skin eating -- there's really nothing inherently spooky about a reanimated corpse with limited super(natural) powers. This is especially true of the sarcophagus' latest big screen incarnation. In Rob Cohen's horrid The Mummy: Tomb of the Dragon Emperor, our wrapped rascal is literally as menacing as an inert stone statue.

Ever since the end of WWII, the rough riding O'Connell Family -- Rick (Brendan Fraser), Evelyn (Maria Bello, subbing for Rachael Weisz), and college age son Alex (Luke Ford) -- have been in semi-retirement. Gone are the days when they would circumnavigate the globe looking for ancient treasure and kicking antiquated butt. When they get the chance to return a precious diamond to the people of China, they jump at the chance. Unfortunately, the gem is instrumental in the resurrection of the evil Emperor Han (Jet Li), a ruthless tyrant bent on conquering the world. Luckily, an ancient witch (Michelle Yeoh) has cursed him to an eternity embedded in rock. Of course, it won't be long before our haphazard adventurers have him up and around -- and seeking immortality via his massive terra cotta army.

Continue reading: The Mummy: Tomb Of The Dragon Emperor Review

Herbie: Fully Loaded Review


OK
A car with a mind of its own meets a screenplay with no mind to speak of in Herbie: Fully Loaded, Disney's brainless but painless effort to reintroduce its overhauled Volkswagen Bug to a new generation of gearheads. And while party gal Lindsay Lohan is a significant visual upgrade over original Love Bug stars Buddy Hackett and Dean Jones, Herbie has the same sophomoric physical gags and safe family humor tucked under his hood.

Lohan plays Maggie Peyton, the only daughter born into a family known for producing stock car drivers. Dad (Michael Keaton) calls the shots from the pits, brother Ray (Breckin Meyer) crashes cars on a weekly basis, and Maggie goes unnoticed until the day she comes into contact with a possessed VW Beetle that feels the need for speed. Together with her best friend and fellow mechanic, Kevin (Justin Long), Maggie starts entering local races, where she accidentally humiliates NASCAR Nextel Cup champ Trip Murphy (Matt Dillon) and sets the stage for a showdown race at the California Speedway.

Continue reading: Herbie: Fully Loaded Review

Miles Millar

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Miles Millar Movies

The Mummy: Tomb of the Dragon Emperor Movie Review

The Mummy: Tomb of the Dragon Emperor Movie Review

In the classic movie monster hierarchy, the cloth-clad Mummy really scrapes the bottom of the...

Herbie: Fully Loaded Movie Review

Herbie: Fully Loaded Movie Review

A car with a mind of its own meets a screenplay with no mind to...

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