Jane Lynch felt like she had a ''disease'' when she realised she was gay.

The 'Glee' actress lived a life of ''secrecy'' growing up in Chicago and confessed her sexuality in her journal - which she promptly threw away so no one would find out.

Speaking in new web series 'It Got Better' - which features LGBT celebrities talking abut accepting their sexuality - she said: ''It was almost like I had a disease I had been diagnosed. I had a journal and ... I remember I wrote, 'I am gay. No one can ever know this.' And I went four blocks away and threw it out in somebody else's garbage.

''It led to a life of secrecy that I had to unravel.''

Jane was terrified she would be ''ostracised'' if she revealed her sexuality to others.

She said: ''For me, to be ostracised would have been the worst thing.

''To be thought of as different and not accepted was a fate worse than death.''

The 53-year-old actress says she always felt different to her female classmates but didn't realise she was a lesbian until she was 14.

She said: ''I identified more with boy things. I enjoyed dressing like a boy. The boys stopped wanting to play with me when I got to be about 10 and I had to fight to play baseball.''