Author: James Brundage
Hudson Hawk
The good thing about comedies, as a general rule, is that they're too bland to have really bad plots. The search for laughs seldom strays too far off the beaten path established by the social...
Movie Review posted on 21st November 2006
See No Evil
See No Evil wastes no time letting the blood flow. Within a few minutes, a rookie cop and a veteran go into a creepy abandoned house, where the rookie gets chopped and the veteran loses...
Movie Review posted on 25th May 2006
Robin Hood: Men in Tights
Mediocre parody movies are Newton's second law as applied to cinema. For every hit over-the-top drama that paints characters by numbers there's at least one end to end parody that makes the cookie cutters look...
Movie Review posted on 24th March 2006
Final Destination 3
Just from the marketing you can tell Final Destination 3 is scraping the bottom of the film franchise barrel. With a tagline like "This ride will be the death of you" you can almost hear...
Movie Review posted on 10th February 2006
Bats
As anyone who knows me will tell you, I don't shut up often. But, when the lights go down, my mouth clamps shut... Unless its a complete Z-grade movie like Bats.Bats is one of...
Movie Review posted on 1st November 2005
The Cookout
About five minutes into The Cookout, a pair of reporters quizzes first-round NBA pick Todd Anderson (Quran Pender) on how it was like to come up from the ghetto. Anderson tells the reporters that he's...
Movie Review posted on 1st November 2005
1999 Madeleine
Snip-snip, Short Cuts. Magnolia, make room. The Decalogue, find a different audience. You guys have company. This company: a 10-year, 10-film series following 10 intersecting French men and women. The...
Movie Review posted on 1st November 2005
Extreme Ops
You know how somehow, God knows why, every movie is somebody's favorite movie. It could be the worst movie in the world, full of bad jokes, a cheesy script, and unexciting action, and you'll...
Movie Review posted on 1st November 2005
Fat Man And Little Boy
The trouble with true stories is a subject I like to tackle. I really hit it hard with Patch Adams, which was idiotic enough to use "based on a true story" as its tag...
Movie Review posted on 1st November 2005
Highlander: Endgame
He is Duncan MacLeod of the clan MacLeod. He's been pimpin' it since he was born in the village of Glennfillan in 15somethingsomething, and he continues to pimp it in modern day. He...
Movie Review posted on 1st November 2005
Hanging Up
There's just something really screwy about a family like the Ephrons.A pair of sisters (Nora and Delia) collectively control the purse strings of many a woman and hold they keys to the heart of the...
Movie Review posted on 1st November 2005
Supernova
When near objects of immense gravity such as black holes, it is said that all things bend. Perhaps it is only fitting that a movie such as Supernova, which poses as sci-fi / mystery...
Movie Review posted on 1st November 2005
An Ideal Husband
Get ready from Romance... British style.The Victorians were well known for keeping a stiff upper lip about everything, and their romance was absolutely no exception. Their entire world was constructed around subtlety, and, in...
Movie Review posted on 1st November 2005
Naked Lunch
Quick, off the top of your head, tell me all you know about this movie.If you recalled fondly the line that Nelson said in an episode of The Simpsons after Bart uses a fake ID...
Movie Review posted on 1st November 2005
Seed of Chucky
Just when you thought puppets couldn't kill and screw any more than they did in Team America: World Police, along comes Seed of Chucky, the fifth film in the Child's Play series. Giving the South...
Movie Review posted on 1st November 2005
Once Upon a Time in China
The West has Billy the Kid and the East has Wong Fei-hung... and if ever the twain shall meet I will lose all faith in humanity and moviemaking. [Check out Shanghai Noon. -Ed.]...
Movie Review posted on 1st November 2005
Alvarez And Cruz
Since this is making the fest circuit right now and already getting a very nice audience and critical response, it's likely that Alvarez and Cruz will be coming to a theatre near you some father's...
Movie Review posted on 1st November 2005
Godzilla (1998)
The sad thing about the cast of the new Gozilla is this: you can't put a name for the part of Godzilla. In lieu of such, I state that Godzilla stars Matthew Broderick, Jean...
Movie Review posted on 1st November 2005
The Ladies Man
Ok. Where in the contract for an SNL cast-member does it stipulate that they will finance your ill-conceived film, no matter what it is? What kind of shyster agent dreamed that one up?...
Movie Review posted on 1st November 2005
Children Of A Lesser God
In my mind there are two types of metaphor movies: those that kick and those that scream. Those that scream take their metaphors and make them painfully obvious to the viewer. We can't help but...
Movie Review posted on 1st November 2005
The Little Vampire
Just when you thought movies couldn't get any more ridiculous, along comes a film that poses the question, "Did Dracula ever have a teddy bear?" I'm talking, of course, about The Little Vampire, a...
Movie Review posted on 1st November 2005
The Unbearable Lightness of Being
When I first watched The Unbearable Lightness of Being, I was dating a poet who had read and loved the book. Not wanting to involve myself in reading the book at that point, I rented...
Movie Review posted on 1st November 2005
Whipped
The time is the present, and the setting is New York: where everyone has game... or at least thinks they do. Brad (Brian Van Holt) thinks he's got game but is really an unabashedly...
Movie Review posted on 1st November 2005
North Beach
As we've seen in several recent Clerks knock-offs, doing nothing isn't anywhere as entertaining as we've all thought. Starting out with damn near no plot, almost no point, and a collection of bizarre characters...
Movie Review posted on 1st November 2005
Chinatown
I do my homework. All right. So I don't always do my homework, but when it comes to film critiquing, I'm pretty good at doing my homework. So, since The Ninth Gate...
Movie Review posted on 1st November 2005
Deceiver
It's becoming pretty trendy to try to surprise the viewer. It seems like, every time I turn around, some critic friend of mine is blurbing about "a twist ending rivaling such-and-such film." The such-and-such is...
Movie Review posted on 1st November 2005
Alive
Ah, the splendid sight of a good movie after a string of bad ones. Understand me, I have seen about five bad movies in a row, and, when I watched Alive, I broke my...
Movie Review posted on 1st November 2005
Chicken Run
Since the beginning of time (or at least the domestication of animals), the chicken has been man's feathered enigma. Like so many of its feathered friends, it has fallen into the realm of the...
Movie Review posted on 1st November 2005
Wild Things
The most often-asked question I have gotten in my career as a film critic isn't how I see the movies. It isn't what I review for. It isn't how much do I make,...
Movie Review posted on 1st November 2005
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