Oh. My. God. Who came up with the idea for this piece of junk? Robert De Niro as a bigoted, half-paralyzed stroke victim who takes speech & singing lessons from cross-dressing Philip Seymour Hoffman? Of course they're going to learn to love one another, if only they can get through the inane subplots involving gangsters and a gay beauty pageant. De Niro has never been worse. Hoffman has never looked scarier. It would be hard to imagine a worse-written or -directed movie. One of the absolute worst films of 1999, and that's being generous.