Ron Fitzgerald

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The Item Review


Weak
Sheesh, how messed up is this? Indie filmmakers make a low-budget horror/gangsterer on videotape -- Artisan decides it likes it enough to distribute the film as is! It's every filmmaker's dream come true, but if I were director/writer/star Dan Clark, I'm not sure this is the story for which I'd like to become known.

The story goes like this: A group of extremely violent Gen-Xish types take a job to pick up and safeguard an unknown item for one night. Out in the desert, they pick up the item from an unusual scientist type -- only to be shown that it is some kind of freaky, wormlike alien asleep in a crate. The scientist ends up dead, they take the worm dude home, and the body count begins to rise. When the worm wakes up (and of course it's gonna wake up!) stuff gets even weirder -- because not only can it talk, but it's apparently so dead sexy that one of our heroines can't help but take a roll in the hay with him.

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