Joan Van Ark, Erin Murphy, Kate Linder, Maria Conchita Alonso and Rip Taylor - Joan Van Ark, Maria Conchita Alonso, Rip Taylor, Erin Murphy, Kate Linder, Barbara Van Orden Thursday 3rd May 2012 Grand opening of the Pooch Hotel
Once again, the film jumps aimlessly from one clip to the next, hoping we find physical injury, constant laddish taunting and obsession with genitalia hilarious. To be honest, some of it is very funny, mainly because we can't believe that an adult would do something so stupid. Many of the gags involve throwing themselves into objects (or vice versa) like a live-action Road Runner cartoon with added bodily fluids. They have rather a lot of fun in the blast area of a massive jet engine and put themselves in jeopardy from some very large animals. One of the more outrageous bits involves playing tetherball with an angry beehive.
Continue reading: Jackass 3D Review
Wayne's World 2 opens with our dynamic duo still running their own show, though they've moved from their basement to a warehouse. Good for them, right? But when smarmy record producer Bobby Cahn (Christopher Walken, coasting but still The Man) steps in to make life miserable and steal Wayne's lovely girlfriend Cassandra (Tia Carrere, who still can't act but is still One Hot Tamale), Wayne is told in a vision by Jim Morrison(!) that he should stage a rock concert in Aurora, Illinois. Waynestock, of course. "If you book them, they will come." This will bring Cassandra back and, no doubt, provide a sense of meaning in Wayne's slacker life. Right? Right? Uh... maybe.
Continue reading: Wayne's World 2 Review
But the first hour of the movie is a punishing parade ofprotracted establishing, colorless characters and painful performancesthat make the picture's amusingly harebrained TV inspiration look likesophisticated action-comedy by comparison.
Seann William Scott (Stiffler from "AmericanPie") and Johnny Knoxville (MTV's "Jackass")play moonshine-running country cousins Bo and Luke Duke -- although theyhave little in common with the sexy charmers in cowboy hats and sparklingsmiles created so charismatically by John Schneider and Tom Wopat in 1979.Scott and Knoxville have re-imagined the characters as the Appalachianequivalent of frat boys, and their acting consists mostly of screaming"woo-hoo!" as they drive around dirt roads at 80 mph.
But at least these two are good for the occasional lowbrowlaugh. Candy-pop "singer" and professional celebrity JessicaSimpson steps into Catherine Bach's butt-hugging cut-off Levi's as sexpotkin Daisy Duke, and she's such a catastrophe as an actress that every timeshe opens her Barbie-doll mouth, just her fake Georgia drawl is enoughto make your ears bleed -- never mind her fumbling dialogue. Knowing whereher assets lie, writer-director Jay Chandrasekhar ("Club Dread,""Super Troopers") does his best to keep Simpson as silent andscantily clad as possible. But even in a bikini, she seems rigid and plastic.
Continue reading: The Dukes Of Hazzard Review
After wishing I could claw my eyes out through "How to Lose a Guy in 10 Days" and now "Alex and Emma" -- the two worst romantic comedies of the year to say the very least -- if I never see another Kate Hudson movie it will be too soon.
The bland but likable young actress has made nothing but stinkers since showing early promise as a slapstick comedienne in "200 Cigarettes" and playing a hesitant bride-to-be in "Dr. T and the Women" before peaking in 2000's "Almost Famous," starring as a rock-band groupie with a heart of gold. But in 2003, she's played two insufferable, irritating-passing-as-cute romantic leads in a row, in two insufferably dopey, counter-programming chick flicks.
February's "Lose a Guy" (up against male-targeted blockbusters "Shanghai Knights" and "Daredevil") featured Hudson as a superficial magazine relationship columnist who deliberately sets out to snare a boyfriend then drive him away -- and in the process has the same effect on any viewer without a fortified tolerance for women who act nauseatingly clingy, cutesy-poo and insecure.
Continue reading: Alex & Emma Review
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