Ape Academy 2
Ape Academy 2 is the next level in monkey `mayhem' on the PSP. Players join the monkeys following their graduation from the `Ape Academy' as they go head to head in a zany "Scissors, Paper, Stone" card battle. The aim is to collect as many monkey trading cards as possible by winning the mini games that follow the card battle, win the game and you get your monkey opponents' card, lose and you lose the trading card you just played. With 300 cards to collect there is plenty of mileage in the game.
The game is split into areas on a monkey island with each location offering stages to meet opponents and win cards. In one player mode you battle the computer but you can play a friend for the chance to win their cards too.
Without doubt the most hateful game I have played in over fifteen years. Ape Academy 2 is one of the most badly constructed and most excruciatingly unplayable poor games made for any game platform since video gaming entered the 8-bit era.
One hundred terrible mini `games' lurk within it, trapped behind a confusing and pointless trading card battle set-up where you attempt to win virtual cards from your ape opponents. The structure is fractured and confusing, game controls are badly explained, (which means you lose the mini games by not knowing what you're supposed to do) and worst of all the games still contains loading screens. Each of these `games' must take around 5k of computing memory to execute so why do I have to wait for them to load? Not since the days of waiting for games to load from audio-tape only for them to crash before completion has the world seen a more frustrating `gaming' experience.
Playing this game is akin to being trapped inside a mental asylum trying to build a house of cards whilst wearing boxing gloves; yes it really is that much fun. I am afraid that anyone playing this game may suffer severe mental stress as they attempt to fathom firstly, what the hell is going on and secondly, are the programmers seriously expecting us to gain any kind of pleasure from playing the thin, awkward and just plain rubbish games skulking within it?
The fact that the `Ape Escape' games from which this title derives are some of the most innovative and joyful ever made only adds to the sheer horror that this game is graced with the same branding. On no level can Ape Academy be praised because of its flaws, which riddle the whole product. Whoever made this game seems to hate children and gamers alike and should be sacked.
3 out of 10