The one statement used in defining a film that drives fear and loathing into my heart is invariably "an outlandish comedy." They try in vain to recycle the originality of American Pie, Porky's, Road Trip, or South Park, attempting to meld a T&A gross-out contest with a love story, and they always fail miserably.

Tomcats wins, hands-down, the lowest common denominator award so far this year. It's a trashy, sexist, crude comedy revolving around the values of commitment, honesty, and screwing your friends over for half a million dollars. In the process, it throws us numerous sex partners, Bill Maher playing a thug named Carlos, true love, and an escaping testicle.

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