Fischer Slams Playwright Over 'Real Actress' Remarks
JENNA FISCHER has named and shamed Hollywood playwright/screenwriter SHEM BITTERMAN for questioning her "real actress" status when she refused to shoot an explicit sex scene. The star of the U.S. version of TV hit The Office was a newcomer to movie capital Los Angeles when she met the writer at a party, and she will never forget his comments, which left her in tears. She tells Playboy magazine, "I had been living in Los Angeles for about a year and was a member of a theatre company. One night, after a play, I went to a party and ran into the playwright. "He said, 'What's your story?' I said, 'I'm from St. Louis. I just got here. I want to be an actress.' He said, 'I'm writing a film, and I think you'd be great for it. But I have a question for you - would you ever do a raunchy sex scene in a movie? Like really raunchy, with nudity?' "I kind of laughed and said, 'Well, I wouldn't do anything I wouldn't be proud to show my parents.' And he said, 'Well, you're not a real actress, then.' I was stunned. "He said, 'A real actress would say yes. A real actress would p**s herself onstage if that's what it took. Sylvester Stallone did porn (1970's pre-fame The Party At Kitty and Stud's, later retitled The Italian Stallion). Shelley Winters p**sed herself onstage. "'Every play, every movie I write has nudity in it. You know why? Because that's how I know if I'm working with real actors. You're not a real actress. You should just go home. You don't have what it takes.' "I went home and cried and cried and cried. What an a**hole, I should have told him, 'How about I p**s on your face? Does that make me a real actress? Let's try that. I'll do that right here. I'll do that today.' Bring me Shem Bitterman."