GARY NUMAN - NUMAN'S SPERM SPECIMEN BLUES

Veteran singer GARY NUMAN once stunned staff at a fertility clinic when his sperm specimen became contaminated with carpet fluff. The CARS star and his wife GEMMA, who now have two daughters, spent six years trying for a child artificially before enjoying natural conceptions. Numan says, "Sperm specimens were always a laugh. When I had to do the business, I thought, 'Well if we're supposed to be conceiving here, I'd rather Gemma was with me. Then she can help out.' "There were no videos in the special room, just magazines and this sink where you had to dangle your bits. The stupid thing was, they give you two pots for the sperm. Halfway through your orgasm you're supposed to swap pots. "Anyway, I completely overshot and it went all over the carpet. We were in tears laughing so much. "Gemma ended up scraping it off the carpet into the jar. God knows what they would have found in the lab: 'Carpet fibres? What's this bloke been doing?'"