Derailed Movie Review

Proving that her brazen performance in Mulholland Drive was a total fluke, Laura Harring's sad attempt at acting in this Jean-Claude Van Damme vehicle is nonetheless the best part of the movie. At least she has personality, if you catch my meaning.

Sadly, this apparent remake of Under Siege II, if you can believe that, has a speeding train, a biological weapon as cargo, terrorists, and Van Damme to muck up the operation. With all the usual atrocious dialogue ("We've got to clear the tracks now... and call the World Health Organization!"), awful effects (some of the worst bluescreening I've ever seen, and isn't that the cutest little model train???), and of course, fisticuffs (poor Van Damme isn't getting any younger), this is one bad, bad movie.

How did I even sit through the whole thing? I can't say. A combination of willpower and being drunk. You might well have to be tied down.

Atrocious.