Dickinson Speaks Out About Daughters Death Message Board and Comments
Comments
I did not know I had Aspergers when your daughter was set free. But know I do I
can understand her pain, how lonely this planet can be for us aspies, I still
feel sad of such an unnecessary lost. Things are bewginning to change, and
since being diagnosed 6 months ago, for the first time I not only know myself,
but can understand my mother.
I have since written an article and set up a web site Aspergers Parallel
Planet, as now I know my Our 'symptoms' are in fact ourselves, not some
unfortunate illness we suffer. We are unique individuals which the so-called
'normal' world often despise and underestimate but don't often try or want to
understand. We have been made to believe in a stereotype of 'normality' for our
children, and to panic, fear and react when our offspring don't achieve.
I am so sorry that your daughter suffered, as did my mother all her life... I
thought you would appreciate this piece of writing from my profile:
"From when you are born society dictates how you act and think to a degree. So
having Aspergers and not knowing when growing up,to me was always like I had
some dark shadow over my shoulder, close behind effecting my every move, and no
clue why.
Now I know I have Aspergers, it feels like a part of my life was stolen from
me. My mother was also taken from me, not being able to be a real mother. She
was so misunderstood, miss diagnosed so many times, she always felt like she
never belonged and consequent of this, she was never happy in this world.
My mother died last August 2006 and this is a paragraph from the service
reading that I wrote just after she died, not knowing she had Aspergers then,
but always knew just like myself, she was different somehow!.
I feel a dark sadness and at the same time joy & peacefulness. To me my mother
seem to have sadness around her, like a lost child she so often seem to be
isolated in her own world, who knows maybe it was a better place.
Lets hope now she can find true inner peace on her new journey, and comfort as
her ashes rise into the light, like a trapped angel who is set free.
My mother was never diagnosed with Aspergers unlike me, she never knew and now
never will. But after she died I started questioning things, which lead me to
discover so much more. If I can help just a few people, to feel and be their
true selves, then thats all that matters. Thats what my web site is all about
and to help raise awareness and under standing for everyone.
I was lost as a child and have now found my true self, the real me."
Was it really Nikki's decision to take her own life, no one will ever know, but
in some of my dark lonely, misunderstood moments it so easily could of been me.
So I feel a connection to Nikki as I do within the Aspie world, which where at
last I have found understanding and the real me.
Aspergers Parallel Planet - www.asplanet.info
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