Michael Leahy

Michael Leahy

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Feast 3: The Happy Finish Review

Very Good
Feast 3: The Happy Finish is a gleefully tongue-in-cheek, genre twisting horror romp that's certain to draw a cult following while sending the same number of viewers running for the hills. By the end of this review, you'll know which one you are.

If Quentin Tarantino were to make a B-monster movie, triple its audacity and you'd have Feast 3. It's hard to believe that the film actually features a scene in which a snarling monster stabs a man with a massive erect penis and ejaculates into him until his body bursts into a gooey mess... a monster whose testicles are so large that they smash into the camera as it lumbers by. And yet it does.

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He Was A Quiet Man Review

Nice guy. Quiet. Kept to himself.

Mass murderers often generate a typical refrain about their "quietness," but no one says such a thing in the middle of their invariably bloody rampages. Here, Christian Slater is aptly cast as a wallflower who's burning with rage on the inside. The catch is that when the appointed hour for Bob Maconel's cubicle killing spree to begin arrives, he's beaten to the punch by another guy who's already killed off half the office. In a split-second, though, Bob chooses to use his own handgun to off the killer, sparing the life of the one girl, Vanessa (Elisha Cuthbert), whom he'd planned to spare.

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Pulse (2006) Review

Earlier in 2006, a killer videogame stalked teenagers in Stay Alive; Pulse ups the ante with ghostly wireless signals stalking college students. The latest J-horror remake never pitches itself over the top, refusing to pile on the jump-scares, fake-jump-scares, and the accompanying soundtrack blasts; instead, it takes a low-key approach... along the way becoming completely unconvincing and almost prodigiously unscary. Boring is the new ridiculous.

It's a shame, too, because computer-centric horror is usually a good bet for ridiculousness. Here, the computer stuff isn't detailed enough to really bug the geeks; they'll be too busy pointing out how the movie's screenplay could be improved, and how Kristen Bell takes one of the most disappointing baths in horror history.

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Hellraiser: Hellseeker Review

It was only a matter of time. The Hellraiser series, which began with a creepy as hell opening in 1987 and managed to stay fairly scary through Hellraiser III: Hell on Earth, has finally gone the way of Leprechaun and Children of the Corn.

Hellraiser #4 took place in outer space. Number 5 went straight to video.

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Trekkies 2 Review

Very Good
Denise Crosby goes where few have gone before -- into making a sequel of a documentary.

Trekkies, the famous send-up of Star Trek culture, explored the Trekkie phenomenon in America. This time around, former cast member Crosby again savagely bites the hand that feeds her and turns her camera on European fans, who are just as crazy as the Americans. Highlights include a group of Germans making their own Trek movie -- complete with authentic-looking Enterprise bridge (at a cost of $20,000) -- plus Klingons playing miniature golf with their weapons, lots of kids dressed up in costume by their cruel parents, and a Brit who's turned his apartment into a spaceship (his bedroom has been converted into a transporter bay, so he sleeps on the floor.

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Mimic 2 Review

Warranted or not, I usually look at direct to video movies as if I'm not getting the best product for my money. In most video stores Boogie Nights and Citizen Kane are the same price as the latest chapter in the From Dusk Till Dawn saga, so why should I visit the cinematic slums if I don't have to?

Mimic 2 isn't an embarrassing rental. It's about as good as any movie about a giant, mutant cockroach can be expected to be. There are a few entertaining moments, some neat scenery to enjoy, and Jon Polito and Edward Albert are both in it. If that last piece of information doesn't make you want run to the video store with heart-pounding glee, then I don't know what will.

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Children Of The Corn: Revelation Review

A little history on the Children of the Corn saga. When the original Children grossed $14.6 million on its $3 million budget back in 1984, the studio was probably pleased as punch, but no one expected the Stephen King-based flick (about Midwestern cult kids forced by a spirit to murder adults) to spawn a series. And in fact, it didn't. The Corn laid fallow until 1993, when a direct-to-video sequel (promising The Final Sacrifice) brought back those murderous kids.

Six films later, they're still at it, and they no longer bother to number the series (what with Children of the Corn 666 appearing two years ago, how do you follow that up?). This time out, poor Jamie (Claudette Mink) heads west in search of her missing grandma, only to discover the hotel she lived at is now overrun by children. You know... children of the corn. Powerful evil awakens -- in the form of corn -- Jamie fights it off.

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Michael Leahy

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Billy Corgan Teases

Billy Corgan Teases "Two New EPs" Of Smashing Pumpkins Songs In 2018

Corgan took to Instagram to confirm rumours of new Pumpkins material, saying the first songs could arrive as early as May.


Michael Leahy Movies

Pulse (2006) Movie Review

Pulse (2006) Movie Review

Earlier in 2006, a killer videogame stalked teenagers in Stay Alive; Pulse ups the ante...

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