Melody Johnson

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Jason X Review


Bad

How someone could make a genuinely boring slasher flick about "Friday the 13th's" Jason Voorhees in outer space is beyond me. Stupid, sure. Badly acted? I'd expect nothing less. Not scary? Well, let's face it: none of the "Friday the 13th" movies have ever been scary. But boring?

Even though I've never been entertained by a single film in this franchise about an indestructible maniac in a hockey mask who guts horny teenagers, I was actually looking forward to this installment. I figured the producers were going for camp value this time -- and in fact, I think that might have been what they were doing. I mean, Jason thaws out of a cryogenic freeze in 2455 and starts cutting up casting couch bimbos on a space ship. If that isn't meant to be the series' most intentionally ridiculous extreme, I don't know what is.

And what about that cast of cardboard-pretty 20-somethings, who are probably already back to serving coffee at Starbucks since this movie was made two years ago? They're so uniformly and painfully untalented that you have to wonder if the people with the worst auditions were given parts in the movie on purpose.

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How someone could make a genuinely boring slasher flick about "Friday the 13th's" Jason Voorhees...

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