Melissa Sagemiller

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Picture - Melissa Sagemiller Los Angeles, California, Friday 10th June 2011

Melissa Sagemiller and Beverly Hilton Hotel Friday 10th June 2011 Step Up Women's Network 8th Annual Inspiration Awards Luncheon held at The Beverly Hilton Hotel Los Angeles, California

Melissa Sagemiller and Beverly Hilton Hotel

Picture - Sarah Jane Morris, Melissa Sagemiller Los Angeles, California, Friday 10th June 2011

Sarah Jane Morris and Melissa Sagemiller - Sarah Jane Morris, Melissa Sagemiller Los Angeles, California - Step Up Women's Network 8th Annual Inspiration Awards Luncheon held At The Beverly Hilton hotel - Arrivals Friday 10th June 2011

Sarah Jane Morris and Melissa Sagemiller
Sarah Jane Morris and Melissa Sagemiller
Sarah Jane Morris and Melissa Sagemiller
Sarah Jane Morris and Melissa Sagemiller

Picture - Melissa Sagemiller Beverly Hills, California, Wednesday 12th September 2007

Melissa Sagemiller Wednesday 12th September 2007 Platinum Guild International with 'Clothes Off Our Back Celebration', Awards and Cocktail Party at the Luxe Hotel Rodeo Drive Beverly Hills, California

Melissa Sagemiller

Picture - Melissa Sagemiller Beverly Hills, California, Wednesday 12th September 2007

Melissa Sagemiller Wednesday 12th September 2007 Platinum Guild International present the 'Clothes Off Our Back Celebration', awards and cocktail party at the Luxe Hotel, Rodeo Drive Beverly Hills, California

Melissa Sagemiller

The Guardian Review


Grim
Much like Top Gun and, to a lesser extent, An Officer and a Gentleman, Andrew Davis' boys-in-basic-training melodrama The Guardian primarily functions as a recruitment tool for its chosen military branch. The Coast Guard would do well to have volunteers posted outside theaters this weekend. Put down the popcorn, pass around the sign-up sheet, and point the way to the pool - we're ready to enlist.

These movies have an established pattern, and Guardian follows it to the letter. To borrow a phrase from Ron L. Brinkerhoff's soggy screenplay, Guardian swims with the current as it tics off predictable accomplishments en route to a by-the-book conclusion. At times, it's laudable. At times, it's laughable. But nothing prepared me for the sheer atrocity that occurs in the film's final frames.

Continue reading: The Guardian Review

The Guardian Review


Grim
Much like Top Gun and, to a lesser extent, An Officer and a Gentleman, Andrew Davis' boys-in-basic-training melodrama The Guardian primarily functions as a recruitment tool for its chosen military branch. The Coast Guard would do well to have volunteers posted outside theaters this weekend. Put down the popcorn, pass around the sign-up sheet, and point the way to the pool - we're ready to enlist.

These movies have an established pattern, and Guardian follows it to the letter. To borrow a phrase from Ron L. Brinkerhoff's soggy screenplay, Guardian swims with the current as it tics off predictable accomplishments en route to a by-the-book conclusion. At times, it's laudable. At times, it's laughable. But nothing prepared me for the sheer atrocity that occurs in the film's final frames.

Continue reading: The Guardian Review

Soul Survivors Review


Unbearable
In my opinion, a movie reviewer's most important task is to offer an explanation for his opinion. But with Soul Survivors, I'm so full of critical rage that this review is liable to turn into a venomous, uncontrollable rant, obligations damned.

However, protocol forces me to do otherwise. Soul Survivors tells the story of four college-bound friends: Cassandra (Melissa Sagemiller) is sweet and innocent. Party girl Annabel (Eliza Dushku of Bring It On) is dating world-weary Harvard student Matt (Wes Bentley). Matt still has feelings for Cassie, who is now dating Sean (Casey Affleck).

Continue reading: Soul Survivors Review

Sorority Boys Review


Grim
The heavily recycled "war-of-the-Greeks" movie theme, first made popular in the early 1980s, has returned to the screen in an updated form with the cross-gender comedy Sorority Boys. The movie is filled to its bong-brim with the crude, embarrassing humor of its predecessors, however its sole joke fails to leave an impact.

Dave (Barry Watson), Doofer (Harland Williams), and Adam (Michael Rosenbaum) are the only members of the KOK (pronounced cock) fraternity social committee. During one bash, the money the house had saved to sponsor the annual KOKtail Cruise is stolen and the three bumbleheads are accused of pilfering the money. They are banished from the house. They then return for the next night's party to find out who really took the money. To get into the party, though, they need a disguise. What better way to fool their fraternity brothers than to show up at the party as women!? "Daisy," "Roberta," and "Adina" go to the party to find a hidden video camera that recorded the true thief in the act. All they need to do is find the videotape and their innocence will be revealed. If it were only so easy! Instead, they are tossed out of the party during the ceremony known as "dogcatcher" -- usually reserved for getting rid of the unattractive women of the neighboring Delta Omicron Gamma (DOG - clever, huh?) sorority.

Continue reading: Sorority Boys Review

THE CLEARING Review


Grim

One simple thing a filmmaker can do to make a picture better is to clearly establish time and place. You'd think that such a thing would be a given, but it's surprising how many filmmakers disregard this simple concept.

For the new film "The Clearing," writer Justin Haythe and writer/director Pieter Jan Brugge (a producer on "Bulworth," The Insider" and other films, making his directorial debut) probably intended to play with time, to bend it and stretch it to serve their purposes. But in the end, they only serve to alienate us by deliberately confusing us.

The film begins like a standard-issue kidnapping story, similar to 2000's "Proof of Life" and a dozen others. The filmmakers cut back and forth between the kidnap victim and his fretting wife, trying to build an equal amount of suspense within each storyline.

Continue reading: THE CLEARING Review

Sorority Boys Review


Zero

In the last act of the misogynistic, hypocritical, completely laughless frat pig flick "Sorority Boys," three guys forced to dress up as girls for the better part of the movie come to realize that women deserve respect.

Apparently that philosophy doesn't extend to the people who made this movie, however, because it's littered with jokes about date-rape drugs and fellatio, scenes of girls in wet T-shirts and scenes of girls taking showers together -- complete with gratuitous close-ups of naked breasts.

Inept rookie director Wally Wolodarsky and bottom-feeder first-time writers Joe Jarvis and Greg Coolidge only condemn the objectification of women as a "Get Out of Jail Free" card after spending most of the picture recycling the tiredest jokes in the campus comedy canon and coupling them with a gag that hasn't been funny since "Some Like It Hot" -- unwilling, ugly, unconvincing drag queens.

Continue reading: Sorority Boys Review

Soul Survivors Review


Unbearable

In "Soul Survivors" a relatively inventive horror movie concept is used as a launching pad for a pathetic parade of standard-issue jumps and frights that can't raise a single goosebump.

The concept (which owes a debt to Adrian Lyne's mind-melting "Jacob's Ladder") is that an angelic coed (Melissa Sagemiller, "Get Over It") becomes haunted by nightmares and vision of her dead boyfriend (Casey Affleck) after he's killed in a car wreck while she was behind the wheel. The girl begins to lose her grip on what's real and what she imagines while her cryptic best friends (Wes Bentley and Eliza Dushku) try to keep her sane.

But two post-production revamps -- one without writer-director Steve Carpenter -- left the film with laughably conspicuous trims for the sake of a belated, teen-friendly PG-13 declawing (now that theaters are enforcing the R rating). All that remains of the story's slight creative promise is a transparent and very pedestrian chiller without chills.

Continue reading: Soul Survivors Review

Get Over It Review


Grim

After Miramax jettisoned all remnants of integrity and started trafficking in assembly-line teen fare, a pattern began to emerge. Once or twice a year the studio would release another insipid high school or college romance starring the phenomenally talentless Freddie Prinze, Jr. -- a bland, blue-eyed magnet for 14-year-old girls. The happy endings always involved girls lowering their standards and/or taking back their pig boyfriends, and it seemed Miramax went out of its way to give each movie the blandest possible title like "She's All That," "Down To You" and "Boys and Girls."

This year's model is called "Get Over It" (the original title, "Getting Over Allison," was apparently deemed far too creative), and while it's still utterly forgettable and mostly unoriginal, at least somebody was making an effort this time.

That somebody would be Tommy O'Haver, the cleverly twinkly hand behind the zestful gay romantic comedy "Billy's Hollywood Screen Kiss." He cast genuinely capable actors like Ben Foster ("Liberty Heights"), playing the picture's generic lovelorn high school boy, and Kirsten Dunst, playing his best friend's sister -- the girl he inadvertently falls in love with while trying to win back his childhood sweetheart (adorable newcomer Melissa Sagemiller).

Continue reading: Get Over It Review

Melissa Sagemiller

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