Mark Tchelistcheff

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Nowhere Man Review


OK
"Nowhere Man" is one of those titles you put on your movie when you've got a story about one guy's personal ennui and no other good ideas about what to call it. Hey, I'm all for ripping off a Beatle's song title for the sake of indie film, but it's always recommended that you be able to back that up with a story that would have done Lennon proud.

Tim McCann's incarnation of Nowhere Man isn't the worst indie that's come across my desk, but it's far from great cinema. The story is pretty simple: Conrad (Michael Rodrick) discovers his fiancee was once in a porn film, and immediately (and quite sensibly, really) he calls off the wedding. Girlfriend Jennifer (scream queen and Troma regular Debbie Rochon) reacts badly, snipping off his penis with a pair of scissors. She then goes on the run, oddly choosing to shack up with her former porn co-star Big Daddy (Frank Oliver, a real porn star). Outfitted with a plastic tube where his unit used to be, Conrad tries to find Jennifer and retrieve his severed member, which he hopes is still in good enough shape to be reattached. The story is told by jumping back and forth between two time periods, each separated by about a day: Before the incident and after it.

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Nowhere Man Movie Review

Nowhere Man Movie Review

"Nowhere Man" is one of those titles you put on your movie when you've got...

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