Mark Acheson

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Alone In The Dark Review


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Playing the most laughable hottie scientist since nuclear-physicist Denise Richards in "The World Is Not Enough," Tara Reid -- Hollywood's poster tart for partying hardy and bad breast implants -- produces one of the defining moments in the utterly inept supernatural action-horror flick "Alone in the Dark."

She's supposed to be a gifted archeologist specializing in rare Native American artifacts -- which when pieced together could open a portal to a monster-spewing parallel world -- yet as she catalogs these objects, she notes that one of them was discovered in "New Found Land."

Her snicker-inducing mispronunciation of the Canadian province clearly demonstrates that 1) Reid is anything but an educated scientist, 2) German director Uwe Boll hasn't learned English well enough to direct a movie in English, and 3) no one else involved with this picture cared enough to say "It's one word, pronounced noo-fhund-lund, you bimbo."

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Alone In The Dark Movie Review

Alone In The Dark Movie Review

Playing the most laughable hottie scientist since nuclear-physicist Denise Richards in "The World Is Not...

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