Mariah Carey would still be married to her ex, music mogul Tommy Mottola, if he had agreed to a trial separation. The singer reveals her marriage became too restrictive for her and she needed a break, but Mottola even refused to let her take spa days with her friends. She says, "I understand him not wanting me to go out and hang out all night, but going to a spa with friends every now and then, or doing things on my own would have made a world of difference. I'd probably still be with him if I had. "Maybe it's for my own good that I wasn't allowed to do those things, but that's not how it felt. I felt like suddenly I had a strict father. "I didn't think I was gonna leave forever... Had it been, 'Go be yourself, you've been with me since you were a kid, let's separate for a while,' I probably would've."