Kerry Katona's fiancé George Kay suffered the equivalent of three heart attacks after consuming a near-fatal cocktail of drugs.
The 34-year-old hunk was detained under the Mental Health Act last month after taking a concoction of steroids, sleeping pills and alcohol which resulted in him running around their Oxfordshire home shouting that someone was trying to kill him and feeling like he was being ''fried from the inside''.
George, who took steroids for six weeks in a bid to get the perfect body for his and Kerry's wedding, said: ''I've suffered the equivalent of three heart attacks. The brain is so delicate and the doctors said it was a chemical imbalance.
''As far as I was concerned, I was just going to the gym. The only thing I remember is this weird feeling of being fried from the inside, the heat was incredible.
''I also felt like I was being watched, then the next thing I knew I was in the ambulance.''
Kerry - who was unaware her fiancé was taking steroids - watched on as six police officers fought to pin George down during the episode, and the furious star admits part of her ''hates'' him and wants to ''beat the s**t'' out of him for putting her through such a stressful time.
When asked how she is feeling, the 33-year-old star - who suffers from bipolar disorder - told OK! magazine: ''Tired, drained and exhausted; I feel like I've had the life sucked out of me.
''George's meltdown terrified me - I hate him a bit for putting me through it. I've never been so scared in my whole life and I'm worried sick. I want to beat the s**t out of him for putting me through this.
''I didn't realise how serious steroid use is, or the effect they can have. It's put huge pressure on his heart and I nearly lost him - he swears he'll never touch steroids again.
''One minute I'm emotional and so upset at the thought of losing him and the next I'm so f***ing angry at him for doing it. I just want everything back to normal and to make sure he's OK.''
Kerry has children Molly 13, Lilly Sue, 11, Heidi, seven, and six-year-old Max from previous relationships as well as three-month-old daughter Dylan-George with George, but she insists she isn't concerned about him suffering a similar episode with her kids around.