Country superstar Keith Urban has revealed all about his secret past of cocaine and alcohol in a new interview.

The Australian singer, who is reportedly dating actress Nicole Kidman, was crowned country music's Entertainer of the Year at the Country Music Association Awards in New York last week (15NOV05), and is on top of the world - a far cry from his days as a struggling singer/songwriter in Nashville, Tennessee.

He says, "I remember one night crawling on my hands and knees, looking for these little rocks (cocaine) at five in the morning. It was the worst.

"You know you have to stop and you can't You look at yourself in the mirror and say, 'Who are you and how the hell did you let this happen to yourself?'"

Urban insists he has been clean since his career took off in 2000, but always fears he might slip back into his bad old days: "I don't know that you ever beat it. It's a struggle for me, because I hate the straight road, too.