Jeffrey Morton

Jeffrey Morton

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Caracara Review

Wow, this HBO thriller started off as interesting, with Henstridge playing a lonely scientist whose sole companion is a caracara (a type of hawk). I was expecting The Falcon and the Snowman. But no, soon enough, "FBI agents" take over her apartment but they turn out to be phonies! Oh dear! They're actually a hit squad out to kill [drum roll] Nelson Mandela!!! By the time Johnathon Schaech starts shooting at people with a contraption that fires arrows instead of bullets, you will long since have tuned out.

Robin Cook's Invasion Review

Sadly, Robin Cook's Invasion is not about an invasion led by craptastic writer Robin Cook. (Or, as the opening credits state, Dr. Robin Cook.)

Would that it was -- it would have been a far better experience. Too bad then that this three-hour rehash of an endless series of movies like Invasion of the Body Snatchers and even video games like Parasite Eve is as hokey and derivative as they come. What makes this miniseries-cum-DVD wholly unpalatable is how poorly it is written, a feat matched only by the shallowness of its acting.

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Second Skin Review

Angus MacFadyen stars in Braveheart. Peter Fonda gets an Oscar nod for Ulee's Gold. And as an encore, they both star in Second Skin, a direct-to-video mess about an amnesiac hit-woman and, as the case says, "a series of suspenseful twists and turns that will keep you guessing until the end."

Sure, I was guessing. Guessing that nothing good was ever going to happen.

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