Mortal Instruments...Of Torture, Critics Slate Harald Zwart's Movie

In a cinematic landscape that includes Harry Potter and Twilight shapes mountains, there isn’t much room for another supernatural teenage escape pod. The Mortal Instruments: City of Bones has attempted to muscle in there unnoticed, but the critics have found it out.

Mortal InstrumentsTeenagers with attitude (and actual weapons)

The story follows a familiar theme of the genre: young teenager – this time Lily Collins as Clary – finds out she can’t just get drunk at 16, moan about homework and eventually marry and have two kids because she’s got to go and save the world. Clary is next in a long line of demon slayers, and has to fulfil her destiny to fight off evil. Having teamed up with people like her, she descends to the dangerous alternate New York called Downworld.

And let the bad filmmaking commence.

Check out the Mortal Instruments: City of Bones trailer before you read all the bad reviews

“There's a Dumbledore, there's a Voldemort, there's a magical MacGuffin that our heroes must track down, but it's a soulless attempt to re-create the Potter magic,” say Time Out, likening the film to Harry Potter but bemoaning its failed attempt to best it.

The New York Post say "The Mortal Instruments: City of Bones" hopes to be the start of a new franchise for tweens and Twihards, but the twuth is this twash is anything but a twiumph,” while Film.com say it’s “Everything you're looking for, provided you're looking for nothing.”

Lily Collins and Jamie Campbell BowerLily Collins and Jamie Campbell Bower in Mortal Instruments

And even when it does try and do something different, say Village Voice, it fails miserably. “An endless parade of derivative genre tropes, even tedious and convoluted when it dares to break the formula-there may or may not be an incest subplot.”

All this negativity has channelled itself into a 25% rating on Rotten Tomatoes. But don’t let that fool you: Toy Story 2 got 100% and we’re pretty sure Mortal Instruments will be more than 75% worse. If you’re a fan of the book you’ll want to see what director Harald Zwart has done with your heroes, if not, we’d suggest cleaning your room instead.

Mortal Instruments castCan the leather-clad hormone tanks save the day?


Contactmusic

Tags: Harald Zwart - Lily Collins - Jonathan Rhys Meyers - Lena Headey


Editors Recommendations

Is The Cannes Palme d'Or Heading David Cronenberg’s Way for 'Map to the Stars'?

The Cannes Film festival is sneaking up fast. The Oscars felt like they were 8 minutes ago...

Is The Cannes Palme d'Or Heading David Cronenberg’s Way for 'Map to the Stars'?

CounterPoint Festival 2014 To Feature Hometown Return of Outkast

Next weekend's CounterPoint Festival will be the event's first year at a new 5000-acre site, featuring...

CounterPoint Festival 2014 To Feature Hometown Return of Outkast

'The Amazing Spider-Man 2' - Not Perfect, But Really, Really Fun

Superhero movies have been striving towards the almost unobtainable goal set...

'The Amazing Spider-Man 2' - Not Perfect, But Really, Really Fun

Ricky Gervais is "Hooked" on David Brent Again - Former Paper Merchant To Return

A return for David Brent has been mooted ever since the character was wheeled...

Ricky Gervais is

This Labor Day, Jay Z Is Bringing "Made In America" To Downtown Los Angeles

Jay Z and the Mayor of Los Angeles Eric Garcetti have announced that the rapper’s...

This Labor Day, Jay Z Is Bringing

Anna Wintour wants 'more exclusive' Met Ball 2014

The editor-in-chief of US VOGUE magazine is reportedly determined for the annual...

Anna Wintour - Anna Wintour wants 'more exclusive' Met Ball 2014

'Mrs Doubtfire' Sequel Will Be Made 21 Years After The Original

The comedy classic 'Mrs. Doubtfire' is reportedly set to return to the big-screen...

'Mrs Doubtfire' Sequel Will Be Made 21 Years After The Original

'Of Mice And Men' Brings Out Broadway Talents Of James Franco, Chris O'Dowd

Of Mice And Men premiered on Broadway last night, giving critics a chance to cast...

'Of Mice And Men' Brings Out Broadway Talents Of James Franco, Chris O'Dowd

Sofia Vergara On Her Menage a Trois in Woody Allen's 'Fading Gigolo'

Sofia Vergara has been speaking about her nerves at shooting a ménage a trois with...

Sofia Vergara On Her Menage a Trois in Woody Allen's 'Fading Gigolo'


More recommendations

Comments

Harald Zwart Newsletter

Subscribe to this news alert service to receive news and reviews on Harald Zwart

Unsubscribe | Unsubscribe All