12 Things We Learnt From JK Rowling’s New Harry Potter Story
Harry and the gang are all grown-up, but where have they been since Deathly Hallows?
Seven years on from the final Harry Potter book, JK Rowling has treated fans to a brand new short story about everyone’s favourite wizard on her website, Pottermore. The 1,500 piece takes the form of a Daily Prophet gossip column, penned by cutting journalist Rita Skeeter. In tabloid style, Skeeter gives an update on what’s happened to Harry, Hermione, Ron and a few others as the Quidditch World Cup finals take place. So what did we learn about Harry and the gang after reading Rowling’s latest writings?
JK Rowling has given fans an update on Harry Potter
1. Harry is still a pretty big deal
‘There are celebrities- and then there are celebrities’, begins Rowling, sorry Skeeter. Yes Harry, who’s still known as ‘The Chosen One’ is as big a deal as ever, even at 34. Skeeter describes how, when word spread that he and the other members of Dumbledore’s Army were in attendance, ‘the crowd stampeded, tents were flattened and small children mowed down.’
2. But he’s looking older
About to turn 34, Harry is described as having ‘a couple of threads of silver’ in his hair, but he still sports his famous round glasses, which Skeeter feels are, ‘better suited to a style-deficient 12-year-old.’
3. He’s also got a new scar
Along with his famous forehead scar, Harry also has a new scratch, located over his right cheekbone. But not even Skeeter knows how he might have acquired it, ‘Is the Chosen One embroiled in fresh mysteries that will one day explode upon us all, plunging us into a new age of terror and mayhem?’ She writes.
4. Ginny’s got a cool job
Not only did she grow up to marry Harry Potter, but Ginny also became a reporter and has been covering the world cup. But not everyone thinks she’s qualified for such an undertaking, namely Skeeter who writes that, 'when your last name is Potter, doors open'.
5. Ron’s still Ron
His hair is still ginger, though it appears to be thinning slightly and yes, Ron Weasley is still married to Hermione. However Ron now manages his brothers joke emporium having left his job alongside Harry at the Ministry of Magic. He’s also described as ‘showing no obvious signs of mental illness.’
6. Hermione is a ‘femme fatal’
We always knew Hermione would be successful and it appears she really is. ‘After a meteoric rise to Deputy Head of the Department of Magical Law Enforcement, she is now tipped to go even higher within the Ministry,’ Skeeter informs us. But our cutthroat reporter also manages to get a dig in ‘Does Hermione Granger prove that a witch really can have it all? (No – look at her hair.)’ Ouch.
7. Harry/Hermione romance?
We know that Rowling has regrets over Hermione ending up with Ron and not Harry, so does that make this line even more important? ‘Press reports of the time revealed that as a teenager she toyed with the young Potter's affections before being seduced away by Viktor Krum, finally settling for Potter's faithful sidekick.’ Ooh, read into that one what you will.
8. Neville and his wife might have a drinking problem
Neville Longbottom is now a Herbology teacher at Hogwarts and his wife Hannah might soon join him at the school. But the real gossip is that they ‘both enjoy a little more Ogden's Old Firewhisky than most of us would expect from custodians of our children.’ Allegedly.
9. Luna’s still very eccentric
Thankfully Luna Lovegood didn't grow up to be normal. Now married to Newt Scamander’s grandson Rolf, Luna appeared wearing ‘a robe with all 16 countries' flags’, and we bet she looked fabulous.
10. Harry’s godson is a wildchild
Teddy Lupin is 16 and appears to be ready to party. With blue hair, he’s described as behaving in a way, ‘unbefitting of wizarding royalty’, but after all, he is half werewolf.
11. Skeeter has written a biography
At the end of the article, Skeeter plugs her new book, entitled, Dumbledore's Army: The Dark Side of the Demob, which is said to be released on July 31. The question is, will we get to read any of it?
Much like Harry, Daniel Radcliffe is also all grown up
12. Where’s Malfoy?
A notable exclusion is Draco Malfoy who isn't mentioned at all in this new story. Where is he? What’s he been up to? Surely he must be almost completely bald by now. Come on, Skeeter/Rowling we need details!