Like a student who dropped out of class after the first day of Horror Movies 101, director William Malone makes the trend-tardy internet fad cash-in flick "fear dot com" look like a horror movie (poor lighting and graphic, misogynistic torture scenes) and sound like a horror movie (lots of screaming and scraping metal knife-slash sounds). But this tawdry, incompetent, six-years-too-late stinker couldn't be more lifeless if all its characters were already dead from Scene One.

The implausibly weak gimmick is this: Everyone who visits the haunted web site -- which takes over your computer and assaults you with scenes of bondage and torture -- begins hallucinating a creepy little white-haired girl, then dies within 48 hours, bleeding from several orifices. If that sounds like entertainment to you, perhaps you should save the price of admission and put it toward therapy.

Investigating the deaths are a scruffy cop from central casting (Stephen Dorff, "Blade") and a Department of Heath inspector (Natascha McElhone, "Ronin"), both devoid of discernible personalities. When they're not delivering cardboard dialogue in performances that scream "please say 'cut!' so I can go to my trailer and lament my career," the two discover an eerie connection between the feardotcom site and the first victim of a serial killer called The Doctor (Stephen Rea, "The Crying Game"), who broadcasts the torture of a pretty blonde live on his own web site throughout the movie.

Continue reading: Fear Dot Com Review