According to my astrologer/numerologist, it's an 18 billion to one shot.
And yet it happened here, when two of the worst films to grace the silver screen have been star-crossed in this conflagration of irony.
There's very little worth writing about in Dog Park. Ex-Kid in the Hall Bruce McCulloch wrote, directed, and starred in this paean to canines, where a bunch of singles in what looks like Boston meet around the local dog park and embark on a romantic affair here and there. Central to this epic saga are Lorna (Henstridge, looking really bizarre with a short hairdo) and Andy (Wilson, playing dumb, as he did in Home Fries). Garofalo and McCulloch make another couple, and various other people intersect the four romantically, all with very little in the way of a point or anything funny -- and with zero chemistry in the entire lot.
As a fan of Kids in the Hall, this is quite a disappointment. Of course, Brain Candy, McCulloch's other writing credit, wasn't a whole lot better. And watch for Superstar, McCulloch's next directorial outing, next week.
A couple of one-liners here and there, and a notable supporting role by McKinney as a dog trainer/psychologist earn Dog Park its half a star, but believe me, these 93 minutes feel like an eternity with nary a laugh to be heard.
Not convinced yet? Here's the teaser copy from Dog Park's Web site: "I think Andy starts to fall in love with Lorna when she pukes on him."
Enough said. Woof!
... and so is this movie.
Run time: 91 mins
In Theaters: Friday 24th September 1999
Distributed by: New Line Home Entertainment
Contactmusic.com: 1.5 / 5
Rotten Tomatoes: 36%
Fresh: 9 Rotten: 16
IMDB: 5.1 / 10
Director: Bruce McCulloch
Producer: Leonard Goldberg
Screenwriter: Bruce McCulloch
Starring: Natasha Henstridge as Lorna, Luke Wilson as Andy, Janeane Garofalo as Jeri, Bruce McCulloch as Jeff, Kristin Lehman as Keiran, Amie Carey as Rachel, Gordon Currie as Trevor, Harland Williams as Callum, Mark McKinney as Dr. Cavan, Dog Psychologist, Ron James as Male Dog Owner #1, Albert Schultz as Male Dog Owner #2, Jerry Schaefer as Norm, Zachary Bennett as Dougie, Kathleen Robertson as Cheryl, Peter MacNeill as Neighbor
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