Christopher Bauer

Christopher Bauer

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Flawless Review


Terrible
Oh. My. God. Who came up with the idea for this piece of junk? Robert De Niro as a bigoted, half-paralyzed stroke victim who takes speech & singing lessons from cross-dressing Philip Seymour Hoffman? Of course they're going to learn to love one another, if only they can get through the inane subplots involving gangsters and a gay beauty pageant. De Niro has never been worse. Hoffman has never looked scarier. It would be hard to imagine a worse-written or -directed movie. One of the absolute worst films of 1999, and that's being generous.

Animal Factory Review


Good
Dear Ma,

After seeing Steve Buscemi's sophomore directorial effort, Animal Factory (following 1996's Trees Lounge), I nearly reconsidered choosing film criticism as a career path. For the first hour of this film, it seemed the way to go was to become a convict. (By the way, ma, they don't call 'em inmates in the pen, they call 'em convicts.)

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8mm Review


Grim
Looking to delve into the smarmy underbelly of hard-core porn, even snuff filmmaking? Well, 8MM isn't going to take you there. 8MM (Eight Millimeter) is something of a joke, and reports of how "disturbing" it is are highly overrated. As horror, 8MM didn't even give me a jump. As an over-the-top "think about this!" piece, 8MM is even less successful. Why? The film's premise (rich widow hires Cage, P.I., to investigate whether her husband's secreted snuff film is real or not) is wholly unbelievable because, as the audience, you know the film isn't real. The dead girl has a credit at the end, for God's sake!

Continue reading: 8mm Review

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