Cary Woods

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Kids Review


Excellent
So much hype has surrounded Kids, the gritty, "not rated" feature about New York teens, that it was almost impossible to go into the film objectively. I was expecting an ultra-graphic film about sex, drugs, and life on the mean city streets. That's about what I got.

The film follows a few characters through one day in New York City. Telly (Leo Fitzpatrick) and his buddy Casper (Justin Pierce) skateboard, do a little petty thievery, drink malt liquor, hustle drugs, beat up a black man, throw some dice, and if a virgin or two happen to cross their path, Telly is only too happy to perform a little "virgin surgery." On their trail is Jennie (Chloe Sevigny), a prior virginal conquest of Telly's, who discovers she is HIV-positive that morning and is on the verge of a nervous breakdown.

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Scream Review


Very Good
My review notes for Scream consist of three whole words:

Totally.F***ing.Scary.

Continue reading: Scream Review

So I Married An Axe Murderer Review


Extraordinary
Shhh. Don't tell anyone. There is a legion of us Axe Murderer fans out here. Most of us live in San Francisco, but we're really quite universal. Wayne's World? Pathetic by comparison. So I Married an Axe Murderer is easily Mike Myers' best movie -- hilarious, with Myers taking his comedy to a new level not hidden within a funky costume (as in Wayne or Austin Powers). We long for a sequel. And much to the annoyance of our friends, we quote it incessantly. Give this film another chance or we'll practice the ancient from of Scottish martial arts on your ass -- Fuk Yu!

Continue reading: So I Married An Axe Murderer Review

The Prime Gig Review


Very Good
Something's rotten in The Prime Gig, but damned if you can put your finger on it. Director Gregory Mosher and his team have done their homework in crafting a suspenseful con-artist thriller by keeping you guessing about just who's getting conned.

Is it Vince Vaughn's Penny, a distrusting telemarketer with questionable morals? Or is it Ed Harris's Kelly Grant, a kingpin of telephone sales who recruits Penny to help him sell $2.5 million worth of investment shares in a gold mine? Or something else altogether? Penny takes this "prime gig," mainly because it gets him closer to Kelly's girlfriend (Julia Ormand), which, combined with his inability to sell anything on the floor, starts to land him in hotter and hotter water. Is any of this legit? Who's conning who? The Prime Gig takes its sweet time in getting to the answer, but it's definitely a worthwhile trip to take.

Continue reading: The Prime Gig Review

Wide Awake Review


OK
Best known for dazzling us with The Sixth Sense, M. Night Shyamalan hit the big screen most recently with this perplexing dud, also about a kid with semi-mystical powers. Wide Awake is not nearly so fascinating as Sense, as it follows the story of a kid who misses his dead grandpa so much he seeks answers about grandpa's well-being from all the religions in the world. Not nearly as interesting as it could have been, Wide Awake quickly provokes yawns and smirks over its cutesy treatment of death.

Cop Land Review


Weak
Cop Land was supposed to do for Sylvester Stallone what Pulp Fiction did for John Travolta. Alas, the movie was (rightly) ignored by audiences and shrugged off by critics, thanks to an almost complete lack of anything so much as resembling a compelling story.

The plot is so simple as to defy description: A lot of New York cops live across the water in Jersey, and it turns out they are all beholden to the mob. It's up to fat, half-deaf Sheriff Freddy (Sly) to expose this atrocity!!! Would that there were more to say, Cop Land builds its "mystery" by simply not telling you what's going on. Only after an hour or so do you piece together the whole mob angle, and then the audience realizes, "Hey, there's nothing happening here!" Note to Mangold: Watch L.A. Confidential a few times if you want to see how clever plot structure goes, not to mention throwing in a little wit here and there.

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Julien Donkey-Boy Review


Bad
Youngster auteur Harmony Korine proves once again that he's fully lost touch with reality in Julien Donkey-Boy, a nihilistic bit of crap that wants to be oh-so-cool but is really just a low-budget exploration of nothing. Ostensibly a story about the half-deranged Julien (Ewen Bremner) and his fully-deranged father (Werner Herzog, of all people!), there's really nothing much beyond the Dogme 95-confirmed videography and scene after scene of meaningless pap. Pretty much in line with Gummo, Korine's most recent work.

Things To Do In Denver When You're Dead Review


OK
The way I see it, any film starring Christopher Walken as a quadriplegic gangster has to have something going for it. And while Things To Do In Denver When You're Dead has something, I'm not quite sure what that is.

Just you're typical gangster/melodrama/black comedy/romance flick, Things To Do... is a stylish story about a few days in the life of Jimmy the Saint (Andy Garcia). Jimmy plays a mobster-gone-good whose attempt at legitimacy is a business known as "Afterlife Advice," where terminally ill clients can videotape future advice for their loved ones.

Continue reading: Things To Do In Denver When You're Dead Review

Citizen Ruth Review


Good
It's been a while since I've anticipated a film this greatly and been let down so much by the actual product. Filmed from Alexander Payne and Jim Taylor's extremely entertaining script, Citizen Ruth had a lot to live up to. Of course, in some ways, it does, and in some, it doesn't. Geez, you'd think I would be used to disappointment by now!

Citizen Ruth is the story of Ruth Stoops (Laura Dern), a "huffer" (paint/glue/other hazardous vapor sniffer) who finds herself the unlikely center of a modern morality play. Ruth, pregnant for the fifth time and up on drug charges once again, is given a choice by an unsympathetic judge: go to jail for criminally endangering her fetus, or have an abortion and face a lighter sentence. Immediately, ires are raised and banners are crafted from both sides of the abortion issue -- with Ruth Stoops, the lowest of the low, right in the middle.

Continue reading: Citizen Ruth Review

Beautiful Girls Review


Excellent
With a cryptic title like Beautiful Girls, one starts to wonder to whom this film is being marketed. Is it the frat boy model-ogling crowd? Is it a self-help flick for teenage girls? Is it soft porn? The answer, of course, is none of these: Beautiful Girls is a date movie, and quite a good one at that.

Something like The Big Chill meets Generation X, Beautiful Girls is one of those ensemble character movies that really defies description in terms of plot points. The ostensible main character is Willie (Timothy Hutton), who is ambivalent about girlfriend Tracy (Annabeth Gish) so heads back home to Knight's Ridge, Massachusetts to sort things out during his 10-year high school reunion. Here, he hooks up with old pals Tommy (Matt Dillon) and Paul (Michael Rapaport), each of whom is also flailing helplessly in his own romantic mess.

Continue reading: Beautiful Girls Review

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Cary Woods Movies

Scream Movie Review

Scream Movie Review

My review notes for Scream consist of three whole words:Totally.F***ing.Scary.What has been billed as the...

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Things To Do In Denver When You're Dead Movie Review

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Citizen Ruth Movie Review

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