Barney Cheng

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Wasabi Tuna Review


Terrible
Wasabi Tuna is the kind of farce that won't settle for just one Anna Nicole Smith drag queen impersonator. It delivers four of them (including the inevitable Alexis Arquette), and naturally one of them is a midget. The fake Annas are there because the real Anna also makes a brief appearance, attempting to play herself and not totally succeeding, making it abundantly clear that this steaming pile was rushed to the screen back in 2003 to make the most of her 14 minutes of fame.

Must I go on? OK. If Anna's not your thing, maybe you'll get off on watching rapidly aging but still hunky Antonio Sabato Jr. as a hardcore lycra-clad spinning instructor leading a class of horny ladies who want to lick the sweat off his tattooed pecs. He's the buddy of Harvey and Evan (Barney Cheng and Jason London), a gay couple who become unwitting drug couriers while doing interior decorating work for an evil and ultra-rich Armenian shrew/drug trafficker who keeps two leather chaps-wearing boy toys as her personal servants.

Continue reading: Wasabi Tuna Review

Wasabi Tuna Review


Terrible
Wasabi Tuna is the kind of farce that won't settle for just one Anna Nicole Smith drag queen impersonator. It delivers four of them (including the inevitable Alexis Arquette), and naturally one of them is a midget. The fake Annas are there because the real Anna also makes a brief appearance, attempting to play herself and not totally succeeding, making it abundantly clear that this steaming pile was rushed to the screen back in 2003 to make the most of her 14 minutes of fame.

Must I go on? OK. If Anna's not your thing, maybe you'll get off on watching rapidly aging but still hunky Antonio Sabato Jr. as a hardcore lycra-clad spinning instructor leading a class of horny ladies who want to lick the sweat off his tattooed pecs. He's the buddy of Harvey and Evan (Barney Cheng and Jason London), a gay couple who become unwitting drug couriers while doing interior decorating work for an evil and ultra-rich Armenian shrew/drug trafficker who keeps two leather chaps-wearing boy toys as her personal servants.

Continue reading: Wasabi Tuna Review

Hollywood Ending Review


Grim
Hollywood Ending - a trite, ugly, and self-indulgent tangent into the complex neurosis of one of American's greatest film directors - stands as Woody Allen's biggest failure in a decade.

Allen plays Val Waxman, a two-dimensional, washed-up film director with a bad case of hypochondria and a reputation in the industry that is on par with Michael Cimino. In order to resurrect his career, Waxman's ex-wife Ellie (Téa Leoni) persuades her studio bigwig boyfriend Hal (Treat Willams) and his over-tanned studio executive cronie Ed (George Hamilton) to hand over the directing duties of their new big-budget noir remake set in Manhattan. Once the deal is done and the directing duties fall into his hands, Waxman's various neuroses finally catch up with him, and he ends up suffering (along with the audience) from psychosomatic blindness.

Continue reading: Hollywood Ending Review

Hollywood Ending Review


OK

While it is getting harder and harder to indulge an aging Woody Allen's enduring fantasy of beautiful young women falling in love with him in his movies, the man's comedy instincts are as sharp as ever in "Hollywood Ending."

The sophisticated screwball jaunt stars Allen as washed-up movie director Val Waxman, whose hypochondria reaches new extremes when he's rescued from deodorant commercial hell by his producer ex-wife (Tea Leoni) and given one last shot by making a $60 million blockbuster. Panicked at the prospect of making or breaking his career -- not to mention working for his ex and the Hollywood greaseball she left him for -- Val goes psychosomatically blind.

Rather than quit the picture and doom himself to showbiz purgatory, he decides he just won't let on. He'll wing it and hope his cast and crew see his apparent ineptitude as visionary eccentricity.

Continue reading: Hollywood Ending Review

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