The Celebrity Autobiographies We'd Rather Not Read

It has been recently reported that child-actress turned troubled adult, Lindsay Lohan, is thinking about putting pen to paper and revealing all about her 28-years thus far. While wild parties, speeding tickets, alcohol-related offences and time spent in prison are all relatively interesting if written in an amusing way, it's hard to imagine this autobiography will be anything but an extended version of the numerous articles already published about her struggles with fame.

Lindsay Lohan
Lindsay Lohan is reportedly set to release a tell-all biography

She is, of course, not the only celebrity that has tried their hand at autobiographies as a way of boosting public interest in a somewhat failing fan base. Here are some celebrity books that we’re not sure we want to read.

Katie Price

With access-all-areas television shows from 2002 until the present day - the latest on Sky Living under the title Katie - surely there is nothing left to know about Katie Price's illustrious career and tumultuous love life?

Katie Price
Katie Price has chronicled her life in a whopping five autobiographies

Not so as the model, turned singer, turned author, turned businesswoman has a phenomenal five autobiographies about her life. Being Jordan came out in 2004 and just two years later, in 2006, the Brighton born blonde had packed enough in to fill another hardback, A Whole New World.

Not content with two tell-all publications, Pushed to the Limit came out in 2008 followed by You Only Live Once in 2010. Finally, to round off the number to a nice, healthy five, the glamour model serialised Love, Lipstick and Lies in The Sun on Sunday in 2013 and revealed as many intimate details as she could about every part of her life.

We can only hope that Katie Price will continue on her journey of marriage and divorce so that in another couple of years’ time we’ll be treated to book number six.

MORE: Katie Price Gives Her Opinion On Cheryl's New Husband's Need To Work 

Kelly Brook

If social media can be trusted she’s an arch enemy of story-telling Katie Price but Kelly Brook is going to follow in her rivals footsteps with an autobiography of her own, Close Up, due out in September.

Kelly Brook
Kelly Brook has an autobiography due out in September

Potentially another dirt dishing tell-all about events more than likely already available from most mainstream news outlets, Brook has referred to her work as ‘deeply personal’ and shared a picture of her front cover on her Instagram account last week.

Chantelle Houghton

Essex girl Chantelle Houghton rose to 'fame' after appearing in 2006's outing of Celebrity Big Brother as the first 'non-celebrity' to compete with real-life famous people in the all-seeing house. She embarked on a very public romance with Ordinary Boys singer, Samuel Preston, in the house and married and divorced him upon leaving the confined Big Brother space.

Chantelle Houghton
Chantelle Houghton has a revealing life story entitled Living the Dream

The next natural step for Chantelle, having lived such as exciting life thus far, was to publish a tell-all autobiography which she duly did in 2006. Entitled Living the Dream, viewers of Never Mind the Buzzcocks certainly did when its then-host Simon Amstell read out extracts from the book causing guest contestant, Samuel Preston, to walk off the set in a huff.

MORE: The X Factor Has Got Another Three Years

Union J

Ever heard of Union J? Well, exactly. But they've still got an autobiography they want you to read.

Union J
Union J may not be The X Factor's most famous offspring but they've still released a book for their true fans

Union J are a boy band, originally a trio with the name Triple J, who were given The X Factor make-over in the ninth series with a new member, a new name and dependable Irishman, Louis Walsh, as their mentor. They finished fourth in the series and signed a record deal with Sony Music subsidiary, RCA Records with which they released an album which went to number six on the UK Album chart.

While nowhere near One Direction fame, the boys clearly thought they had done enough to make an interesting autobiography and released Our Story: Union J 100% Official.

MORE: Cheryl Refuses To Sit Next To Louis On New Panel Of The X Factor

Paul Burrell

The death of Diana, Princess of Wales in 1997 led to a country in mourning and an opportunity for celebrity advancement for her butler, Paul Burrell. He has regularly appeared in connection with Princess Diana over the time since her death and has done numerous things to ensure his connection kept him in the media eye, including a release of his memoirs, A Royal Duty, in 2004.

Paul Burrell
Paul Burrell didn't keep Princess Diana's secrets very secret for long

Organised in disarray, Burrell's book has been described as part history, part therapy, part gossip and part eulogy and, if anyone wanted a genuine understanding of Princess Diana and the Windsors, surely not the text to go to for truthful and objective answers.


Tags: Lindsay Lohan - Katie Price - Paul Burrell - Kelly Brook - Chantelle Houghton - Union J


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