Andrew Bryniarski

Andrew Bryniarski and Friends - Andrew Bryniarski and friends Las Vegas, Nevada - Memorial Day Party at Wet Republic at the MGM Grand Monday 26th May 2008

Andrew Bryniarski and Ditch - Andrew Bryniarski and Ditch Hollywood, California - Ultimate Action Sports Celebration presented by Rolling Stone Live and hosted by Tony Hawk at Avalon Sunday 5th August 2007

The Texas Chainsaw Massacre: The Beginning Review

By Chris Cabin

Bad

There's a great conversation that goes on in the original The Texas Chainsaw Massacre where a crazed man and a van of hippies awkwardly talk about the difference between the new way of killing cattle and the old, barbaric ways. The new way is painless and more sanitary in general, but it was bad for social matters (layoffs, machinery-over-manpower etc.) but the old way was brutal, unclean and considered inhumane. At the time, this conversation was meant to point out how the '60s counter-culture wanted to help the poor workers but disapproved and actually fought to get rid of the jobs they had. How proper it is that now, 32 years after the original and three years after the original remake, the same argument can be used to discuss what has now become the Texas Chainsaw Massacre franchise.

The film begins with the terrifically gruesome birth of none other than Tommy Hewitt, aka Leatherface (Andrew Bryniarski). He is born in the dark, dirty floor of an old-style killing floor, and thrown out in the garbage behind the plant. There, he is saved by an elderly woman who brings him home and puts him under the care of his Uncle Charlie (R. Lee Ermey), who later takes on the identity of Sheriff Hoyt, the Texas town's only cop who is disposed of after he calls Tommy "retarded." Time passes and the Hewitt family, at the full swing of the Vietnam War, happens upon two soldiers and their girlfriends. Only one of the girlfriends (Jordana Brewster) stands a chance of surviving the night.

Continue reading: The Texas Chainsaw Massacre: The Beginning Review

The Texas Chainsaw Massacre: The Beginning Review

By Chris Cabin

Bad

There's a great conversation that goes on in the original The Texas Chainsaw Massacre where a crazed man and a van of hippies awkwardly talk about the difference between the new way of killing cattle and the old, barbaric ways. The new way is painless and more sanitary in general, but it was bad for social matters (layoffs, machinery-over-manpower etc.) but the old way was brutal, unclean and considered inhumane. At the time, this conversation was meant to point out how the '60s counter-culture wanted to help the poor workers but disapproved and actually fought to get rid of the jobs they had. How proper it is that now, 32 years after the original and three years after the original remake, the same argument can be used to discuss what has now become the Texas Chainsaw Massacre franchise.

The film begins with the terrifically gruesome birth of none other than Tommy Hewitt, aka Leatherface (Andrew Bryniarski). He is born in the dark, dirty floor of an old-style killing floor, and thrown out in the garbage behind the plant. There, he is saved by an elderly woman who brings him home and puts him under the care of his Uncle Charlie (R. Lee Ermey), who later takes on the identity of Sheriff Hoyt, the Texas town's only cop who is disposed of after he calls Tommy "retarded." Time passes and the Hewitt family, at the full swing of the Vietnam War, happens upon two soldiers and their girlfriends. Only one of the girlfriends (Jordana Brewster) stands a chance of surviving the night.

Continue reading: The Texas Chainsaw Massacre: The Beginning Review

The Texas Chainsaw Massacre (2003) Review

By Sean O'Connell

Terrible

Aren't remakes intended to improve on the films they're honoring? First-time director Marcus Nispel may return audiences to the Lone Star State to recreate the horrific and (not really) "factual" events of August 20, 1973, when five hippies were abducted and tortured by a killer named Leatherface and his inbred family of cannibals. But this flavorless rehash ultimately proves you can't just fire up a power tool, hang an innocent teenager on a meat hook, and call yourself The Texas Chainsaw Massacre.

The new Massacre hacks away everything different and inventive Tobe Hooper's original film did for the horror genre. Graphic yet pointless, it introduces five teenagers returning from a Mexican vacation who make the fatal mistake of stopping to ask a woman wandering the side of the road if she needs a ride. They assume she's on a bad acid trip, and intend to turn her over to the local authorities. Little do they know that their bad trip has just begun.

Continue reading: The Texas Chainsaw Massacre (2003) Review

Andrew Bryniarski