Adam Simon

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The Haunting In Connecticut Review


Weak
For those of us growing up in the '70s, there was one seminal, supposedly true, scary story. No, it wasn't Helter Skelter or the trumped-up Texas Chainsaw Massacre. No, in high school cafeterias everywhere, we teens were talking about George and Kathy Lutz and their 1977 journey into red-eyed demonic pig terror, The Amityville Horror. The novel was a post-modern masterwork, a complete con passing itself off as irrefutable "fictional" reality. Now comes The Haunting in Connecticut, a similarly-styled exercise culled from a novel, plus an episode of the always trustworthy TV show from the Discovery Channel. Oddly enough, it's another network -- Lifetime -- that sets the tone for this tepid terror tale.

Ever since he was diagnosed with cancer, life has been a struggle for Matt Campbell (Kyle Gallner). While his recovering alcoholic Dad (Martin Donovan) tries to maintain house and home, well-meaning Mom (Virginia Madsen) drives several hours to Connecticut to try an experimental technique which offers some hope. The toll on the teen is too great, however, so Mom eventually moves the family to an old dilapidated house so he can be closer to his doctors. Almost immediately, weird things start happening. The building creaks and odd ethereal noises are heard. Soon, Matt is seeing spirits and discovering the facilities for a funeral home in the basement. As dark forces torment him and the rest of the Campbell clan, Reverend Nicholas Popescu (Elias Koteas) tries to save them from the evil forces festering in this psychically charged dwelling with a terrifying, telling history.

Continue reading: The Haunting In Connecticut Review

Bones Review


Weak
In this cheesy flick, rapper extraordinaire Snoop Dogg simply barks up the wrong tree. Snoop, who has previously tested the acting waters with his menacing persona in inner city dramas such as Training Day and Baby Boy, gets to strut his stuff in director Ernest Dickerson's garishly laughable thriller. Dickerson (Juice) wastes his star in a labored vehicle that is riddled with misguided camp and countless spook-infested clichés. Not enough to even deem this imbecilic fable a worthy copycat blaxploitation flick, there are sticks and stones that can certainly break the brittle Bones. No doubt the filmmakers behind this bloated hip-hoppish Halloween costume drama will draw its intended audience to see their "phat" Snoop Dogg do his thing. It's too bad he plays second fiddle to the ridiculous premise of this mockish movie.

Snoop Dogg portrays charismatic hood Jimmy Bones, a stylish late '70s dude with a cool demeanor to match his threads. Jimmy has always protected his community by looking out for his crime-ridden neighborhood. He possesses the cocky swagger of John Shaft and the street savvy of Superfly's Priest. We're told in flashback that Jimmy Bones refused to deal crack cocaine to his beloved people, and thus the crooked cops and thugs snuffed him out. But nobody betrays Jimmy Bones -- nobody! So he comes back from the dead.

Continue reading: Bones Review

Brain Dead Review


Weak
Is Bill Pullman's brain doctor dead, alive, crazy, sane, what? This bit of Corman (his daughter, anyway) nuttiness has a couple of big pre-star stars in "the two Bills," and while it tries to be as clever and provocative as a movie like Jacob's Ladder, it ends up as inexplicable and inscrutable as Lost Highway... which oddly enough starred Pullman as well. I won't try to explain the plot (okay: brain doctor's brain goes bust), but I don't necessarily suggest you watch it, either.
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Bones Movie Review

Bones Movie Review

In this cheesy flick, rapper extraordinaire Snoop Dogg simply barks up the wrong tree....

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